There’s a common misconception that dismantling harmful gender norms is a women’s issue—like it’s some extracurricular activity women signed up for, and men are just spectators. As if centuries of conditioning can be undone with a few conferences, a trending hashtag, and the occasional corporate pledge. But let’s be honest—if men played a significant role in setting up these structures, it only makes sense that they should be just as involved in tearing them down.
The Everyday Battlefield
Contrary to popular belief, fighting gender bias doesn’t require capes, placards, or grand speeches at town halls. Sometimes, it’s as simple as speaking up in the boardroom when a female colleague’s idea is conveniently “rediscovered” by a male counterpart instead of saying, “Actually, that was her idea.” Or ensuring that roles and promotions are earned on merit, not on the ability to befriend the boss at Saturday’s football game.
In Nigeria, we’ve seen how ingrained these biases are. A woman with excellent leadership skills is described as “too assertive,” while a man with the same qualities is seen as “decisive.” A husband helping out in the kitchen is considered “doing his wife a favour,” while a woman working late is “neglecting her home.” These mindsets don’t just appear out of nowhere—they are nurtured in everyday interactions. Men need to unlearn them and call them out when they see them.
Rewriting the Playbook
Many men grew up with a rigid rulebook: be tough, don’t cry, don’t show emotions, and always be in control. But let’s face it—this playbook isn’t just limiting women; it’s holding men hostage too.
A workplace where vulnerability is seen as a weakness fosters poor leadership. A culture where men are expected to “provide” but not “collaborate” leads to burnout. And let’s not even talk about the unspoken rule that only women should take time off for childcare, even though fathers are just as responsible for raising kids.
So, gentlemen, it’s time for an update. Supporting gender equality isn’t about being a hero—it’s about realizing that the world works better when opportunities aren’t restricted by gender. It’s about mentoring women the same way you’d mentor men, ensuring they have a seat at the table, and—this is crucial—actually listening to them when they speak.
The Real Leadership Test
Dismantling gender norms isn’t about “allowing” women into spaces; it’s about acknowledging that they belonged there all along. It’s about shifting from lip service to action—ensuring hiring and promotion processes aren’t influenced by outdated biases, speaking up when unfair decisions are made, and creating an environment where women don’t have to work twice as hard for half the recognition.
The Takeaway
Men don’t need to “save” women from gender bias. They need to stop reinforcing it—whether consciously or unconsciously. That means challenging biases when they appear, amplifying women’s voices instead of talking over them, and making room at the table without expecting a round of applause.
So, the next time you witness a woman being sidelined, interrupted, or unfairly judged, ask yourself: Am I okay with this? If the answer is no, do something about it.
Because gender equality isn’t just a women’s fight—it’s a collective responsibility. And if we truly want a better future for our daughters, sisters, wives, and colleagues, it’s time for men to step up.
No cape required.
