Before I leave you wondering about the title, I assure you it’s metaphorical. I did not actually walk in heels because if I did, I probably would be missing a few teeth by now.
Barring the one year I spent working for a community newspaper pre-NYSC, I’ve only ever worked with female CEOs – two of them – so if I said I don’t exactly know what working for male bosses feels like, I’d be relatively correct. I’m pretty sure good leadership isn’t a quality that resides more with one gender. However, I also think that there are nuances in how women lead that make female bosses different from men and would like to share three things I’ve picked up.
- You fare better when you bring your unique self to work.
The female bosses I’ve had are brilliant, driven, creative, visionary, fierce, competitive, and so much more. That’s normal, right? What’s unique is that they all retained their femininity and didn’t feel a need to ‘act like’ men to be heard or respected. They smiled, laughed a lot, and still got things done. This showed me that you don’t necessarily have to become someone else to excel in your chosen field. A better version of yourself? Definitely. But not someone else.
- Surround yourself with a good support system
One thing I never used to do well as a guy, was asking for help or reaching out when I needed support (I still struggle by the way). But with these women, I saw how they got more done by retaining a good support system of family, close friends, and colleagues. This could be me helping the kids out with homework or anyone doing something else but they could travel, hold meetings and do so much. It makes me wonder why anyone would even try doing it alone when it wouldn’t hurt to ask for some help.
- You don’t have to have all the answers at the beginning
I’ve seen and heard two women talk about the remarkable things they’ve done, like building companies from scratch, launching transformational projects, etc. This may not be a gender-specific thing but I think I’ve heard more women talk about starting from a place of uncertainty – almost like building the plane while flying it – than men. It’s not like they didn’t have a plan, but I imagine that in a world where women have to push harder for opportunities, 1+1 isn’t exactly 2. As a woman, you don’t know what would happen if you took a break off work to raise kids with the hopes of getting back to your career; you don’t know how you’ll be received in a new industry, and so on. Many people hesitate in taking their next big step or following their dreams mostly because they don’t know how it would play out. But the bosses I’ve had showed me that it’s okay to do it afraid and start by modelling for the magazine you’re starting or by building a top healthcare company from a ‘BQ’.
I’m sure that if I think about it, there’ll be way more lessons but these 3 rank top of mind for me. I hope that they resonate with someone out there as well; man or woman, it doesn’t matter because knowledge doesn’t have a gender bias.
Happy International Women’s Month!
Thanks Deoye. Good insight.