By Owen Omogiafo
This month, I finish the second half of my article on being a mother and balancing it with my career. You can read the old piece here. Interestingly, it’s also the International Women’s Day, and guess what the theme is?! That’s right: “Balance for Better.” This is so timely, because as female professionals, especially for those just starting out, we are in a constant tussle to balance work with family, or balance expectations with deliverables. So, here are a few other nuggets that helped me in my journey.
Managing Guilt
Do not feel guilty about having to make certain decisions as it relates to advancing your family life or your work life. You may have to attend a critical meeting, which may make you miss out on a school play or PTA, just as you may have to miss out at a work event, so you can attend to family. Guilt is a very unproductive emotion, as it quickly deteriorates into resentment, then bitterness, making you completely miss out on the moment. What do I do instead? Whatever decision I have made, I do my utmost to make it work, knowing that it was the best decision to make at the time.
Time Management
Time is your most valuable resource. Use it wisely. It is one resource that whether you use it or not, it will be spent. It really does not wait for you. Thus, it is important to evaluate your use of time and identify the time wasters or things that you can save time on and use said time to do other things.
Below are a few things I do to save on time:
- Bulk purchase – This way I do not have to go to the market or shops often
- Bulk cooking – I refuse to have a cook, as cooking my family meals is one of the ways I stay connected to them. Cooking is time-consuming, so I make huge batches of food and freeze them (I have 2 freezers for this purpose!)
- Long-lasting hairstyles – I choose styles that will enable me visit the salon like once in 6 weeks. Styles like braids, crochet or good old wig wearing!
- Acrylic wrap on my nails – I love having pretty fingernails, so I wrap my nails in acrylic so the nail polish can stay on for as much as 3 weeks.
Selfishness
It is okay to say NO! This has been quite a journey for me, as I am by nature a very generous person. I have however learnt to say no, especially to things that may deplete my valuable time such as social things that I cannot do with my family.
Role Models
It is always good to have strong, relatable role models. Role models can be people you know and people you do not know. Some women I look up to that I know are Patricia Aderibigbe, Omobola Johnson, Toluleke Adenmosun, Nimi Akinkugbe, Parminder Vir to mention a few. and those I do not know are Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, Indra Nooyi. I draw strength from my role models when I falter; I say to myself, if Patricia could rise to the position of COO of a 19-country European company (despite being black and female!) and could manage a home while at it, so can I! When I was appointed CEO of Transcorp Hotels Plc and faced with the tough decision of how to manage the home, this role model paradigm came to my rescue
Make Time for Yourself
5 a.m. to 6 a. m daily is what I like to call ME time. It is the time I spend reflecting on my journey and how I am doing. It is my quiet hour. I also take time off during the day, for me. It is okay to love yourself and pamper yourself. I recommend it.
